Boy, this movie is a hard one to talk about. Nothing really happens in this movie, and when something does, the movie finds a way to do it wrong. This movie isn't even so bad it's good, its just bad. This movie is even worse than "The Legend of the Titanic" and "The Creeping Terror" combined. Well, without anymore stalling (God knows I want to keep stalling, but the review must go on), let's talk about "Zaat!".
The movie starts off with the best way to start off a movie - a title screen with no sound! Yes, we only get a terribly hand-drawn pair of eyes, with the movies alternate title "Blood Waters of Dr.Z" over them. Yes, this movie is an obvious overachiever. Then we get our soon to be fishman Dr. Kurt Leopold (Marshall Grauer) spurting out phrases such as "And just at the right moment, ATTACK!", and "I love you, Sargassum fish" over stock footage of ocean animals, that look just about as confused as the viewer is. Leopold is then seen wandering around like he doesn't know where he's going, with the soundtrack of a terrible folk song about the upcoming events of the movie.
He enters his laboratory, which looks more like someone's basement, and describes his formula "Z sub A sub A sub T". Then he does something nobody wanted to see, he strips down to his underwear. He then ejects himself, or rather poorly make it look like he ejected himself, with a strange yellow liquid. He then pushes a button, which makes the blood water from the title of the movie shoot out in his inside pool (because most laboratories have those). The doctor then puts himself in a harness, and almost falls off in the process, to emerge himself in the food coloring that's suppose to be blood.
After raising himself from the pool again, we see that he turned into one of the worst movie monsters I've ever seen. He's suppose to look like a catfish, but to me he looks like a mix between Trumpy from "Pod People" and the Grinch. He announces how beautiful he is, then he looks at his wheel to decide who is the first to be fish food. In the beginning of the movie, he said he was going to take over the universe. Well, he's going to take over the universe one person at at time.
We then see two cliche characters- a sheriff who can't act in the slightest (Paul Galloway) and his assistant...? The scene doesn't really go anywhere, it's just there to introduce these bland characters. We then see him stalking a girl (Fish can be perverts too), which he kidnaps the next morning, constantly tripping on the way. The Zaat tries to turn her into a Zaat too, but since she's pushing up daisies, it doesn't work.
After more killing scenes, bland dialogue from biologists, sheriffs, and agents alike, the Zaat breaks in to a department store and throws everything all over the place. We then see more of the agents and sheriff, investigating the murders, and not until 20 minutes from the end, sheriff remembers the doctor, and says hes probably behind it. He then captures the girl agent, Marsha (Sanna Ringhaver, and by the way, I had to look up these character's names, because they are barely mentioned), and her friends have to save her. They find Zaat in the laboratory, and he kills the sheriff, and nearly kills Rex (Gerald Cruse). Marsha gets ejected with Zaat, but is saved by Rex before she can get put in the food coloring..... I mean blood water.
The monster than runs like a chicken (Or chickenfish) with canisters of the formula with him. Marsha follows him to the ocean, both to supposedly to never be heard from again. The movie then ends, and this is when everybody lets out a sigh of relief.
This movie is the absolute meaning of awful. It barely has a plot, bland characters, terrible acting, a god awful costume, and unprofessional camera work (The cameraman kept a shot of nothing happening for a whole minute). But this is nothing compared to what's next.
My rating: 2/10 IMDB rating: 2.5/10 Next review: Monster A- Go Go (1965)
Monster A-Go-Go is next?
ReplyDeleteI thought it was going to be Munster Go Home :c